so is this mega sword what you want for your birthday? Was it the double pig chop that got you hooked?

Where to begin…

First, I. Want. One.

Second (and all subsequent points)…

They should have had the buff, “asian” chin-up dude handle this video. My only guess for why he didn’t is that he is a mute – and therefore, only good for the chin-ups.

I want to see more of the “chubby dude” peddling products. Maybe he could take over where Billy Mays left off.

Great for chopping off your attackers toes before fleeing – especially if they wear cowboy boots and have meaty enough feet to fill every last inch of them.

Seriously, the stances and poses of “chubby dude” are awesome – striking real fear in sleeping, lethargic cows and pigs everywhere.

Thank you for this.

screw the sword, i’m getting you the pudgy dood to be the mr. diggles spokesman!

I have a feeling that the day they shot that was the greatest day of the chubby dude’s life. He was having so much fun slicing shit up and posing like a medieval knight!

The part that really got me was when he popped a balloon with it. That totally sold me, because so many swords on the market today just can’t cut through that thin rubber membrane.

You can tell that this sword makes these guys feel like bad asses. And what do they have against pigs? Seriously though, I wonder how many other chubby dudes bought this thing and hacked up some pigs…