mike dick + his zune pwned.

December 31, 2008

apparently this dude broke in on an 88 year old woman. he chose to not wear clothes and when he decided to attack the old lady she grabbed his twig + berries. and i bet she just downright owned them. after she did her handwork he was out like lightning. a loud voice probably went of in his head as she dug in her nails… anything but this… god please, anything but this… – gone.

to make the story even better… the dudes last name is dick. maybe i am wrong but i don’t think i have ever heard of someone with the last name dick? except maybe moby? either way mike, old ladies are stronger than you think. and they know the soft spots.

read the story here.

after seeing this story i found a website that calculates how many 5-year-olds you could beat up. i was hoping it was going to be old ladies for the sake of this post but 5-year-olds will do.

the url is in fact: howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com. i did the test and i was told i could take 22. i doubt those results. i think i would freak out at about 7. unless they were zombies whose souls had already passed and i had to go nuts just to survive. with like a baseball bat with nails on the end. if that was the case, i could take at least 30.

in other news, the zune sucks!

Zune

on december 30 a wave of microsoft 30GB HDD zunes in circulation apparently froze at the exact same time and reports are still turning up. even though the little machines are rendered useless, this is what microsoft had to say:

We are aware that customers with the Zune 30GB are experiencing issues with their Zune device. We are actively working now to isolate the issue and develop a solution to address it. We will keep customers informed on next steps via the support page on zune.net (zune.net/support).

i don’t give zune shit because i am an ipod elitist. i have a 1st generation 1gb shuffle that barely works. i just don’t think microsoft should have competed in this market. rant! rabble rabble rabble!

darsh, freaks, microsoft

← i’m not dead. i am very much alive.

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To your first post (regarding Dick), and my comments below are not a joke, I thought I’d list some of the funniest names I have come across in my life:

1. Babes Fagnet (went to my parent’s church as a kid)

2. Dick Burns (went to my parent’s church as a kid)

3. Benjamin Diggles (worked with him at Chili’s restaurant about a decade ago). When I first met him, I said “Hi, my name is Garett,” to which he replied, “Hi, my name is Benjamin Diggles…” I then replied, “No seriously dude, what is your real name?” He then responded proudly, “It’s Mr. Benjamin Diggles…”

lol good times Diggs

Gary Stenny // December 31st, 2008 // 2:26 pm

I can take 26 5 year olds. No mercy!

Zune sucks.

Adam // December 31st, 2008 // 4:31 pm

Andy Dick?

Lisa // December 31st, 2008 // 10:41 pm

My boyfriend waited on a guy named Richard Smalls once.

jecka // January 2nd, 2009 // 1:05 pm

Once knew some people who IF they had chosen to hyphenate their names would have been Dickson-Cox.